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As a parent, it is very important to talk with your child about school. While the goal is never to make the child feel as if he is monitored or forced to do something, it is a necessity because proper monitoring is always helpful. The key here is “proper” though.
Based on the experience of a Harrisburg divorce attorney, huge communication problems appear between parents and children. This is especially true when referring to school. Fortunately, if you know what to do, you can actually make your child discuss school topics with you. This all boils down to some actionable tips that you can learn about below.
Talk About Other Things First
One of the huge mistakes you can make as a parent is to first ask about school as you discuss how the day went with the child. This is not a good idea and can only make the kid become defensive. They feel intimidated because the first thing that comes to mind is usually the failure, not the success.
The best thing you can do is to greet your children as they come home from school. Then, talk about other things so they become more relaxed. Let school come into the conversation in a natural way that does not involve any pressure.
First Listen
Talking about what you have to do first. If you are patient and you do not pressure the children, you quickly notice that they start to talk about school alone. Such conversations are always a lot better because the kids decided to talk about what happened.
As an example, the child might have some homework to do after school. During the afternoon, he/she asks to use the computer so that some information can be researched for school. This is a great opportunity to start a natural conversation about school that was actually initiated by the child.
Discuss Your Day First
So many natural school-related conversations happen because a parent shared some information about what happened during the day. It can be a joke or something else that is interesting. You never know what can stimulate a conversation and what can lead to discussing school in a very relaxing setting.
Ask Questions Directly
Way too often parents ask questions that are not at all beneficial in terms of having a good conversation. For instance, most simply ask how the child’s day was at school. This is way too generic. A much better approach would be to ask something that is more direct. For instance, you can ask questions like:
- What was fun today during school?
- Did you play a sport in P.E. today?
- What was the best thing that happened today at school?
- Did Mrs. X discuss something interesting during history class?
The Backpack As An Effective Conversation Starter
Oftentimes, parents simply do not know how to start talking about school. If this is the case, helping the child with the backpack can help so much more than you might think. You practically turn the backpack into a conversation topic by discussing arrangements, what the child needs to take to school the next day and similar topics.
Respect The Learning Style Of The Child
Last but not least, remember the fact that children learn in different ways. Your preferred learning style might not be what the child prefers. There are many that learn through auditory listening while others are very good visual learners.
As a parent, it is your responsibility to realize what learning style best works for the child. Then, you need to respect this. For instance, if visual learning is what the child is best at, ask the child to draw something instead of writing or talking about how the day went. Remember that proper communication takes time and full attention from the parent, which is what you should always prioritize.
