Being in a relationship means taking the other person as they are. Whether they’re happy or sad, rich or poor, sick or well. It’s the latter we’re going to focus on in this post, as when health worries strike one person, the other person will have to navigate them as well.
And this can lead to a lot of tension between the two of you, especially if someone feels misunderstood, not taken seriously, or like too much is being asked of them. The more you feel the health worries are getting in the way, the more distant the two of you are going to become.
That’s not something we want to see happen with the person we love. Thankfully, it’s also something we can nip in the bud from the moment it steps foot into your relationship.
Whether your partner is dealing with physical or mental worries, or even both at the same time, there’s plenty that can be done to help them while also helping yourself. Check out the list of tips we have below for a little bit of guidance on that.
Take Up a Physical Hobby Together
This is a direct way to support your partner’s health needs, as you’re going out of your way to physically engage. It can also be quite good for your own health, so there isn’t really a drawback to trying this idea out. You’ll need to have enough time in your own schedule to do so, but if that’s not going to be an issue, why not take up a physical hobby with them?
There may come a point where it seems like you’re putting in a lot more effort than they are. If that’s the case, make sure you bring it up as soon as you notice it. Don’t let them get into the habit of skipping the class you take together, or seeming to always have an excuse for not being able to visit the tennis courts with you.
Hold them accountable, as someone who loves them and wants the best for them. Of course, they may genuinely be unable to continue with the physical hobby you’ve taken up together, and they shouldn’t be pushed to compete when they’re too weak for it or in pain.
But if you know this isn’t the case, state your observations plainly, simply, and in a non-accusatory manner. You don’t want to push them further into their shell, but you do want to get the point across. Remember, the two of you are in this together, and that’s an excellent thing to remind your partner of as well.
Talk Through Treatment Options with Them
When someone has to undergo treatment for a health issue, they’re naturally going to be worried about what that will entail. As their partner, they’re probably going to turn to you to ask for advice and your own opinion. Think of this as a bid for reassurance in a moment when their nerves are frayed and they may not even be sure if they’re going to come out the other side OK.
Even smaller, non life threatening issues, can be hectic to try and sort out in your own head. Your partner may come to you for a viewpoint on what they should do to aid weight loss, especially if their doctor has told them they need to try and drop some pounds.
Of course, if you don’t have much of an opinion for them, it’s OK to say. But don’t leave it there. Offer to go through the potential options with them, and help them in their research. This is another way you can support them, even if you don’t really know what to do yourself.
Be a Shoulder to Cry on
Sometimes that’s all we really need when we’re dealing with health worries. We just need someone to hold us up, and let us be vulnerable in front of them. That may be your partner’s case, and it’s best to double check that before you try anything else.
Practical support is crucial, but emotional support is usually the fixer here. Don’t offer advice and suggestions when someone hasn’t asked for them. Instead, hold their hand, offer your shoulder, and empathize with what they’re going through. You can then ask them to do the same.
Never Put Blame on Them
Health worries aren’t to carry blame with them. It may be frustrating to see your partner do something that goes against their current health plan, but remember what they’re living with right now. Whether or not they’ve been diagnosed or are currently in treatment, try not to lay any blaming language around their health at their door.
Health can change in an instant, and it can change even when you’ve lived as healthily as possible up until this point in your life. The idea that you could have ‘done better’ to stay healthier is an entirely unhelpful one, especially when it comes from someone as close as the person you share your life with.
Of course, this is something that is often understood from the off, but tiring days can make tension creep in. Recognize this when it happens, and make sure you’re also receiving support from those around you. The more you have a therapeutic outlet for your own thoughts and feelings, the better you’re going to be able to support your partner.
Providing Support When Your Partner’s Experiencing Health Worries
Health worries can happen to anyone. When you’re in a relationship, however, those worries can affect the both of you. Because of that, it’s best to work together on facing the future and living in a way that’s healthy for both of you.
And even when you’re the one doing most of the support, it’s OK to ask for support in return. Your partner will want to go the extra mile in return for you, and your support network will always be there to lend a helping hand when you need it.
