Domestic violence is defined as a series of patterns which indicate abuse towards one family member by another in a domestic setting. This abuse usually occurs between two people sharing an intimate relationship. The American Medical Association (AMA) describes that domestic violence occurs as an abuse of power and the domination, coercion, intimidation, progressive social isolation and victimization of one person by another by physical, sexual or emotional means within an intimate relationship. So, if you or someone you know is at risk of domestic abuse, you can take action to acquire security by going through the protective order process.
Types of domestic violence
The main types of domestic violence are:
- Physical violence
- Sexual violence
- Emotional violence
- Psychological violence
- Verbal abuse
- Financial abuse
Identifying the pattern of abuse
Identifying abuse in a close, intimate relationship between a couple is often challenging as the victim has difficulty recognizing abuse. A victim undergoing endless trauma is sometimes unable to process the situation at hand. It is of great importance that a victim is introduced to domestic abuse patterns as his or her entire life depends on it.
Patterns of abuse
Domestic abuse is one of the leading crimes all over the world with severe consequences. To recognize domestic abuse patterns, the victim needs to check their partner’s actions and identify if the given pattern matches their actions.
The coercion of a controlled environment in a household where the abuser abuses his or her power 24/7 and controls every aspect of the victim’s life is a red flag. They will not let the victim hang out with their friends and keep a serious check on them when they do go out.
Domestic violence is life-threatening. Studies show that in 2014-15, 81 women were killed by their former and current partners. If your partner threatens to kill you, or physically abuses you on multiple occasions, then that is a sign to take your leave and seek help as your life may be in danger. A series of physical and/or sexual abuse is the most apparent pattern of abuse. If that is the case, immediate help from domestic abuse hotlines or domestic attorneys is advised as they will tell you how to proceed further in this delicate matter. The best you can do is research and associate the abuse symptoms with valuable resources like the expert’s website or abuse portals.
When victims do report abuse against them, the report identified by some police officer’s lack of empathy with victims experiencing domestic abuse is one of the critical factors in contributing to poor practices.
The vicious cycle of violence
The three identified phases in the cycle of abuse are:
- Tension building phase
- Acute or crisis phase
- Calm or honeymoon phase
Over a period of time, the cycle might change. The calm phase might be shorter, and the acute phase could be more prolonged and vice versa. This change in the pattern should not be considered redeeming as it might change any minute. The feelings of guilt, insecurity and concern for children’s well-being plays a huge role in the victim’s decision making.
Breaking the cycle
Following measures can be taken to stop the traumatizing spiral of abuse:
- Speak to a professional or someone you can trust.
- Use the hand symbol for reporting domestic violence. This method helps avoid any digital trace if that is seen as an issue.
- Establish secure boundaries.
- Protect your children and teach them about consent.
- Accept the abuse and mentally prepare yourself for actions to be taken.
- Learn to care for yourself and recognize your worth.
- Educate yourself about the patterns and the actions that can be taken against it.
Your body and life are yours, and no one has the right to dictate how you live your life. Seek help from professionals and untangle yourself from the horrifying and tragic shackles of domestic abuse.
