That divorce is expensive is neither a new nor happy thought. In fact, many couples put off getting a divorce because they don’t have the economic resources to afford a marriage dissolution at the moment. Such financially-struggling couples prefer to separate and live apart, waiting for their children to grow and the divorce process to get less complicated for them. However, not many divorcing couples understand that self-representation is actually an option available to them.
According to a Divorce Statistics report, “the estimated cost of a divorce in the US ranges from between $10,000 and $20,000, with an average of $15,000.” Not every middle-class family can easily fork over thousands of dollars to get divorced. Not to mention less financially stable households. Many parents in their late 30s are struggling to pay off student loans while dealing with rising rent costs, exacerbated by hospital fees and child care. They find themselves in a paradoxical situation in which they are too affluent to qualify for legal aid yet strapped for cash to hire a lawyer. Spouses remain legally glued to each other for years simply because they have no spare money to hire an attorney for each spouse to handle all their divorce-related issues.
However, each US court offers a pro se option to divorcing couples. Meaning ‘for oneself’ in Latin, going pro se in divorce proceedings is the cheapest option for those who don’t mind going deep into the state’s family law and legal procedures without an attorney. A pro se divorce, also known as a do-it-yourself divorce, doesn’t mean a divorcing couple cannot consult an attorney. You can pay a fixed hourly rate for an attorney to draft a settlement agreement for you or explain some specifics of your case. But anyone who wants to get a divorce can file their own case and go through all the stages of an uncontested divorce without paying the exorbitant cost of divorce.
If you decide to represent yourself in divorce proceedings, you will need to pay only filing fees, a notary fee, and a process service fee. But this is only if neither spouse is contesting custody or the equal distribution of marital assets. Wyoming has the lowest cost for filing the divorce papers at $70, which is well below the national average of $215 and considerably less than California, which has the highest divorce filing fee – $435.
In “The DIY Divorce: How I Got Divorced without Hiring a Lawyer,” Deborah Copaken, an author and a contributing writer at The Atlantic, says that instead of the $30,000 retainer her lawyer expected of her, she pursued a lawyer-free divorce that cost her $626.50. It took her 15 months, though. But no lawyer can promise a fast and easy divorce either.
What You Need to Apply for Divorce on Your Own
Not every divorce can be DIY. There are certain factors you need to take into account.
Your Personality. You may think your personality has nothing to do with legal matters, but in fact, your temperament and occupation are essential for this legal adventure without a lawyer. You need to have the patience and perseverance to muddle through the intricacies of state laws and time to do so. Deborah Copaken says that a lawyer acquaintance of hers told her: “You’re educated, you speak English, you’re rational… It’s not easy, but it’s doable.” As long as you can search information online, fill out legal forms accurately, and follow through with a divorce procedure and court appearances, filing for divorce without a lawyer is possible. Even though there are differences, divorce procedures are similar across states. Ensure you are familiar with the divorce timeline and all waiting periods.
United Front. Any divorce-related issue can be handled without legal representation as long as spouses are able to agree on the terms. On the one hand, the petitioner (the filing spouse) can independently sort out the entire divorce process. If you are the petitioner, you don’t need your spouse’s agreement to kick-start your divorce. You can file all the paperwork and do the legwork on your own. But you both need to agree on the major issues of child custody and property division. These are the major pains in all divorces. If you can’t, you’re having a contested divorce, which means litigation requiring legal representation.
Developed Tactics. Deborah Copaken shares a piece of advice her lawyer acquaintance gave her. Referring to it as “a highly specific, counterintuitive order,” the lawyer advised Copaken, “First you file for custody, then child support, and then, only once you have those two rulings firmly in place, you can file for divorce.” Because child custody and allocation of assets are the most contested issues, taking them out of your way may speed up your divorce process, or at the very least, it will not hamper it. If the spouses have no spousal support (alimony) or the equitable distribution of marital assets and debts, it makes the divorce process even simpler.
State’s Help. US states provide divorcing spouses with all the information they need to pull off do-it-yourself divorces. Many states have self-help manuals on their websites. Some states offer seminars on DIY divorces. Furthermore, the fact that all US states now have no-fault divorce is incredibly helpful for divorcing couples because they don’t need to accuse their spouses and bear the burden of proof of adultery or abandonment in case they want to divorce. Now no grounds for divorce are required other than ‘irreconcilable differences.’
Legal Help. If you don’t hire an attorney to take your divorce case from the beginning to the end, you can still consult one as “limited-scope representation.” It means that you prepare the documents and file them on your own, but the attorney can give you advice at an hourly rate.
Complete Divorce Online. You can also use an online divorce forms preparation service to fill out the court forms and prepare them for filing at the court. Also called internet divorce or web divorce, divorce over the internet means that divorce companies help a divorcing couple prepare a written application for divorce online. Although filing and getting a divorce online is not possible in the US, preparing divorce forms online is an affordable option that makes the dissolution of marriage easier.
When You May Need a Divorce Lawyer
Divorcing spouses are highly recommended to hire an attorney if:
- One spouse has hired an attorney (the other better hire one too just to be sure that their interests are met)
- The spouses contest any divorce-related issues
- The spouses fail to meet any court requirements (any complicated circumstances are better to be handled by an attorney)
- One spouse is uncooperative (the petitioner can initiate a DIY divorce, but if the respondent is vindictive or refuses to settle, a mediator or a lawyer can help to sort it out)
- Either spouse is abusive
If your income level qualifies you for legal aid, try to get legal representation through the local bar association.
Wrapping Up
Self-representation is the most inexpensive way to get divorced in the US. No one can promise it will be quick, though. If you feel you need a divorce to move on with your life, give yourself plenty of time and a thorough review of the laws and procedures before plunging into the challenge of a DIY divorce.
