When parents split up, it can be an incredibly difficult and emotional time for the entire family, especially for children. According to a recent report from the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, the divorce rate in the U.S. is 40-60%, and the majority of separations involve couples with kids under the age of 18. Additionally, research shows that children of divorce are twice as likely to drop out of school and suffer from poor mental health compared to kids whose parents stay together. And, when asked, 45% of kids who live with one parent only said they never feel happy.
While divorce is undoubtedly painful, there are ways for parents to help minimize the disruption and fallout for kids. Here are eight effective strategies divorcing parents can follow to help their children better cope and adjust.
Provide Stability & Consistency
Studies indicate that a steady routine and consistency between two households can go a long way toward helping kids feel more secure. Try to establish regular schedules for meals, bedtimes, chores, etc. Having set routines gives children a great sense of comfort.
Involve Them Appropriately
While it’s important not to overshare or undermine the other parent, providing age-appropriate facts helps diminish worries stemming from uncertainty and imagined scenarios. So, get clarification from your local divorce lawyer and invite your children to ask questions about what is happening.
Give Reassurance
Let your kids know that both parents still love them and that the divorce wasn’t their fault. A lot of children tend to blame themselves initially when their parents split up, so providing lots of reassurance is crucial. Tell them every day that you both love them.
Facilitate Open Communication
Create an environment where children feel safe confiding worries, fears, and feelings. Be open and willing to listen without judgment. Encourage questions and address concerns head-on. Make yourself available for talks at any time. This Mesa teen therapy will help the child and their parents to handle those tough situations in a wise
manner.
Establish House Rules & Discipline
Come to an agreement with your ex over essential rules and disciplinary measures to maintain consistency across households. Differing standards between homes is frustrating for kids. Create comprehensive guidelines you both agree to.
Make Regular Adjustments
Revisit arrangements regarding schedules, rules, transitions, etc. every 3-6 months and make necessary adjustments. Children’s needs change frequently as they grow. Be prepared to adapt approaches as needed.
Seek Outside Support
A child therapist can help kids express emotions, gain coping skills, and navigate complex dynamics. Studies show the sooner counseling starts, the better children manage. Look for specialists in childhood grief.
Equally, seeking guidance from an experienced Seattle divorce attorney can also provide valuable legal support and ensure a smoother transition for both parents and children.
Put Kids First
Ongoing parental conflict takes a heavy toll on children. Making kids the priority means fostering amicability with your ex whenever possible and shielding kids from adult disagreements. Never argue in front of them.
The dissolution of a marriage marks the start of a tremendous transition period filled with challenges for the entire family. While divorce universally brings pain, parents can implement strategies to ease hardship on children. With stability, open communication, outside support, and putting kids’ best interests first, families can effectively weather the storm. Most children are quite resilient, and employing healthy coping mechanisms empowers kids to regain their footing under trying circumstances.